We still need change
Around 2 p.m. on Feb. 25, a vending machine on the second floor of the North Classroom was robbed of $185 in quarters. Police said that an unknown device broke the machine’s door, which was protected by a cylinder lock. A thorough investigation traced the theft back to UC Denver’s Bursar’s Office, one floor below the machine. The official position of the university has been to avoid comment. But police theorized that our university, like every other in the state, is simply collecting funds, one quarter at a time, in preparation of our debilitating budget cut due next fiscal year.
Sit down and shut up
On March 2, Auraria police were dispatched to deal with a possible threat to a teacher. A Metro instructor reported that a student who was upset about his grade began yelling at the instructor during class. The student eventually sat down, but, according to the police report, “stared at the teacher in a way that made the teacher uncomfortable and afraid for her safety.” This incident is similar to a situation that occurred a few weeks ago wherein a clerk at a grocery store looked at the instructor in a way that made her feel as if she needed to pay for her groceries, which made her afraid for her checking account balance.
Need a friend, little guy?
On March 4, an Auraria police officer who was making his rounds through the Tivoli discovered a student lying on the floor. The subject told the officer that he was having a bad day. An ambulance was requested, and the subject was taken to the hospital. Upon examination, the subject was found to have an incurable case of the Mondays, which, according to the paramedics, was peculiar, because he was found on a Thursday. Doctors swiftly prescribed Adderall, and the student is apparently twice as focused on his crippling depression as he was before.
True Crime
Standard issue thefts and arrests
Published: Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Updated: Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Be the first to comment on this article!